When Should Childhood Nudity Stop?

As mentioned in an earlier post, I attended a family reunion last week and got to be in the presence of the one man in American who knows everything. My brother-in-law, who is a seminary principal, is certain he has everything figured out and he’s more than happy to dispense his wisdom to whoever is within range of his voice. Never mind that his education is from the University of Phoenix and the farthest he’s ever traveled is to West Coast on a mission. When one of my baby’s was undergoing a life threatening surgery, he had the audacity to e-mail that we should do his baby blessing immediately so he wouldn’t die, not something any mother wants to hear at that stressful moment. I don’t think anyone has ever said something to make me angrier, but at my celestial sex partner’s request I kept a lid on my fury.

So, when we saw him at the family reunion it was a given that he’d say something infuriating or just plain stupid. My baby (who remains unblessed, but survived) has been suffering from heat rash and being outside during the family reunion wasn’t helping so I removed all of his clothes except for his diaper while we say in the shade.“Whoa, get some clothes on that baby!” He said and my husband and I laughed thinking he was joking. Problem was, he wasn’t. He went on, “The other day my neighbor’s son, Ezra, was out playing with a hose- they’re Bible freaks, anyway the kid was nude. I mean the kid is two (he holds his fingers up), TWO,” he spits. “So I pulled up and told his dad to get some clothes on that kid. You just can’t let your kids run around naked, there’s gotta be a cut off,” he said.

My CSP and I spoke that unspoken marital language with our eyes and we both agreed he was an idiot. Our silence made him uncomfortable, which I enjoyed. Earlier that week I’d let my four-year-old swim in the backyard kiddie pool naked because the baby was already in it, nude I might add, and I couldn’t leave him alone to go upstairs and get my older child's swimsuit, plus I didn't really care. I’d won't let him go in the front yard like that, but when he was two I saw no problem with it if the occasion arose.

What do you think, are nude kids something to be chastised over? Where do you think the age “cut off” is for public childhood nudity?

A Rose By Any Other Name Would Smell As Sweet

Since our children are boys, I’ve let my celestial sex partner handle the topic of how they should refer to their private parts. Personally, I was thinking we’d use the anatomical terms, but my CSP was concerned that we’d be at some public place and one of them would yell out something embarrassing about their penis, so instead he opted for the name, “peeper,” which I have to say is cute. However, I only let the boys watch Noggin television (commercial free) and every hour the station owl mascot comes on urging the kids to, “Point your peepers at this,” before a new program starts and I’m sure my preschooler is now terribly confused. Since my oldest son has just turned four, he’s asking a lot of questions about my anatomy, so I’m wondering if he’s at the age where I can no longer change in front of him or do the occasional quick shower together. A few weeks ago we were both in the shower when he asked, “Mommy, what are those?” as he pointed to my chest.
“Those are breasts,” I replied.
“Why?” his new favorite word.
“Well, they are how babies get mother’s milk.”
“Like sippies on your body?” And I burst into laughter nodding my head.
Then, two days ago we went to Target and I needed to get a new bra. I don’t even bother to try things on anymore since one of them always opens the door or crawls into the next room. So I picked out a bra and tossed it in the cart.
“Why do you wear that on your milks?” asked my oldest.
I had to suppress laughing at the term “milks” that he'd come up with.
“So they don’t fall down.” I reasoned.
“They fall off if you don’t wear one?” he asked.
“Sometimes I wish they would.” And some days I really do wish they would.

So, around your house what terms are you using to describe your bits and berries? For those of you with older kids, at what age would you suggest a mother stop changing/showering with her kids?