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My little sister’s BFF just returned from a mission, met a guy, and on Sunday after three months of dating, they announced they were engaged. This left me stunned, more so when she asked my parents if she could have the reception in their yard on October 3rd—the couple will have known each other less than six months by then. In the Mormon faith we consider marriage to not just be for life, but for ETERNITY…yet we have some of the shortest engagements and marriage counseling isn’t a prerequisite. This doesn’t make sense to me, what do you think? (Full disclosure: I dated my Celestial Sex Partner for 6 months/wrote on his mission 2 years/ dated another year, engaged 6 months and somehow we didn’t have sex before marriage).
Tonight was supposed to be the marriage of an acquaintance but it was called off five days before the temple ceremony. I was callous enough to inquire why and learned the bride had uncovered a trail of lies when it came time to get an apartment and make joint credit purchases. And you guessed it, they’d only been dating a few months before the engagement.
For those of you who read the earlier post "Beware of Men Who Don't Just Grow Beards, They Marry Them." That wedding was supposed to take place this month, but has been postponed until October. I’ve decided to mind my business and hope his bride will realize she’s hitching her wagon to an experienced gay ox that will only pull her away from the life she’s envisioned.
While I applaud the church’s emphasis on marriage, it would be nice if the younger generation took more time in choosing an eternal companion than they did when deciding on a new car, at least with a car you have to get a credit check.
To my CSP, happy anniversary and thanks for choosing this eccentric Molly to rock your world for the last fourteen years!
Like a waterfall in slow motion, Part One
2 years ago
6 comments:
I'm a fan of long courtship (or friendship even before dating) and short engagement. I thought engagement was torturous. I think when it's right it's just right but do you really know that after 30 seconds?
I have always thought snap marraige decisions were a really bad idea. It's different when you have been friends and dated/known each other for years then decide to be engaed for 3 months. That's fine. But when you have have only known/dated each other for 2 months then decide decide to get married 2 months later -- that's crazy!! You hardly know each other! I think you should date each other for at least a year before you get married. Give yourself time to really get to know each other instead of letting your hormones be your guide.
As long as premarital sex is verbotten in Mormon culture, courtships will be short. Plain and simple.
ok, talking from experience.
You never know when the spirit has TOLD those people to get married. Granted this is probably not as often as it should be in short engagements.
Personally I ALWAYS told myself i would know my spouse AT LEAST 6 months before I married... and hopefully at least a year. Needless to say Heavenly father had somethign else planned. I think he was trying to remind me I wasn't the one at the wheel.
I met my hubby on July 1st and we were married on Aept 22nd. YIKES.
7 years later... God knew what he was doing.
April, check in again after a few more years. Then you could make comments like that, than again you might have been blessed with clairvoyance and can see the decisions your husband makes.
Yes but April if it's right and God told them too -- it will still be right in 6 months or a year and they will be better prepared for it and each other
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