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A week back I saw a news story that the LDS church handbook had been put online through www.wikileaks.org Being the curious chick I am, I had to read it, yep, the whole thing. Let me just say I never knew baptizing “trannies” was an issue (that would explain a few people in the ward), but basically that’s as exciting as it got until I hit page 197 out of 198. Here’s the passage:
Surgical Sterilization (Including Vasectomy)
The Church strongly discourages surgical sterilization as an elective form of birth control. It should be considered only if (1) medical conditions seriously jeopardize life or health or (2) birth defects or serious trauma have rendered a person mentally incompetent and not responsible for his or her actions. Such conditions must be determined by competent medical judgment and in accordance with law. Even then, the persons responsible for this decision should consult with each other and with their bishop and should receive divine confirmation of their decision through prayer.
We currently have two children and day to day, depending on how crazy things have been, the number of children my husband and I want changes, but one thing never has- that when we decide we’re done having babies, he will graciously submit himself to a vasectomy. My body will have been through enough, so tag--- he’s now it. Well, come to find out it’s pretty much classified as a sin since I don’t have a medical condition unless you count temporary insanity resulting from the serious trauma of finding (1) a small child has wiped red lipstick on my date night dress or (2) done some disgusting business in the toliet and left it unflushed in a non-airconditioned house the whole week we were on vacation. "Honey, why does the house smell like the sewer? Oh, that's why!"
So, what do you think? Is it worth possibly falling short of the celestial kingdom to have one sinful snip that results in decades of carefree sex?
fMh Anniversary
8 months ago
9 comments:
I remember my brother-in-law having this done after #2. None of my in-laws are members of the church, and I never really passed judgement on anyone for surgical birth control before, and I guess I never really cared...but for some reason when he chose to go that route...I was sooooo sad! I even actually cried just a little bit. That was the day I decided that we could never do something THAT permanent in our own family. The Spirit just told me it wasn't the right thing for us. That said, I do know member families who have chosen that route and do no regret it, so...
It's kind of weird that the church came out with a firm standing on the issue. They're so vague about so many things so much of the time...though, I guess they did kind of leave it open as an option since they mentioned speaking with your bishop and praying for divine confirmation. I guess you and your husband should start praying now. This could take a while. LOL
Lots of people regret it, so make sure you are absolutely sure! My cousin had her tubes tied and they healed themselves. And a guy in our ward had the snip and then they got pregnant again anyway. So if you are meant to have more, you will have more!!
Can you post a link to the booklet? I'd like to read it too.
I have real issues with the church's stance on birth control. Yes, the Lord did say to go forth and multiply and replenish the earth, but he has also laid the charge upon us to care for our children as children of God should be cared for. I find it extremely irresponsible to pop out babies constantly until one hits menopause, and trust me, I've known a few LDS women who have done so. One, they cannot actually financially provide for their children (and trust me I wasn't raised on fine foods and expensive clothes--I'm talking practicality here) and worse than the financial aspect, these women cannot really devote the kind of emotional care that these children really deserve. What ends up happening is that the older kids raise the younger ones.
Now, if other forms of birth control work for you, right on. However, for me, I am allergic to pretty much everything out there--allergic to latex, spermicide, and any hormone replacement (pills, patch, etc. . .). We have four children and plan on having another, but after that neither one of us want any more children, and so my husband will happily submit. This was a struggle for me, because I have always look at permanent forms of birth control was taking the power of procreation out of the hands of God, but I am also very aware that I cannot emotionally or financially handle any more children. The subject of birth control should be between husband and wife and God, no one else should be entitled to that discussion. The Lord has trusted us with sexuality between husband and wife and birth control is an extension of that. I don't think it should be the Bishop's business or anyone else's and no one should be judged for their choices in this matter. I don't think that having a vasectomy will keep one from the celestial kingdom, as long as a couple has truly consulted with the Lord and are doing what they know to be right for themselves and for their children. Some would say it is selfish, and that is something that can happen, but if we truly consult with the Lord and know the true reasons why we seek this form of birth control, I don't see how it can be wrong.
Here's the link to the church handbook.
http://wikileaks.org/wiki/Mormon_Church_Handbook_of_Instructions_%281999%29
Or you can go to www.wikileaks.org and put in "Church Handbook" and it will come up.
in regard to some of the things above my the anonymous commenter... the scriptures say that a man shouldn't run faster than he has strength and I think that applies to having children... don't have more than you can provide for or keep up with.
also I found a good Q&A on LDS.org about birth control:
http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=f318118dd536c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=6979fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1
I'm sorry I'm not good with HTML so you'll have to copy/paste that. It addesses some of the issues mentioned.
The great thing about the Gospel is that every person has the power to receive revelation for themselves and their stewardship (in this case, the family) so that we can all make the best decisions for ourselves with the help of God. The other great thing is that we have such good organization in the Church so that no one goes off with private interpretation (2 peter 1:20 no prophecy of the scripture is of any private interpretation) Bishops aren't there to control our lives and they don't have stewardship over our families like we the parents do, but they are there to help and guide us.
This doesn't mean to have a bazillion kids, just be smart about it! Of course don't have so many kids you can't mentally, financially, etc handle it! There are other things you can do that don't involve surgery.
Ever since my stake president told me 'appropriate postitions' during my temple recommend/marriage interview I've taken the army's stance... Don't ask, Dont' tell. The Bishop doesn't belong in the bedroom. Period.
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